GAKE NO FUCHI JOSHI PRO “GAKEPPUCHI SNOW WHITE 2020”, 04/01/2020
Tokyo Itabashi Green Hall
1. Gake no Fuchi New Year Falls Count Anywhere Hardcore Match: Chris Brookes (3,007 pts) defeated Miyako Matsumoto (1 pt) with the Praying Mantis Bomb (55:45).
Who is crazy enough to run against the Tokyo Dome on 4th January. This year it turns out to be a lot of people, actually. One of them was Gake no Fuchi Joshi, running their second show after a successful debut. Miyako Matsumoto thanked the fans for coming to the show today, especially the one person who was watching wrestling for the first time.
The theme of today’s show was “Overseas Expansion”. There were fans from around the world who came here to see Chris Brookes. Matsumoto threatened to kill all of them. The match was broadcasting on Youtube so English commentary was provided by Shota and Mr. Haku. A Spanish announce table was also set up but the one Spanish person who bought a ticket went to Suidobashi instead of this show so the Spanish commentary was no longer going ahead.
The Gake no Fuchi rules for Matsumoto Vs Brookes was Hardcore, falls count anywhere, no rope breaks and no time limits. The match would end after a pinfall, submission, referee stoppage or knockout. However the winner would be determined over who had the higher amount of points from the minigames. After the entrances, both wrestlers stood for each other’s national anthems. Brookes had the British anthem and Matsumoto sang the Gake no Fuchi anthem. Brookes then attacked Matsumoto to start the match.
The 1st minigame was “Gake no Fuchi Sumo Match Day 1”. Brookes easily threw down Matsumoto to win a point. “Gake no Fuchi Sumo Match Day 2” then began. This time Matsumoto took on Brooke’s ringside second Drew Parker. Matsumoto went to grab his leg but fell on her knees, giving Brookes a second point. Brookes and Matsumoto fought outside where Brookes gave Matsumoto a Back Body Drop onto the ring apron. He put her in a Romero Special when Kuishinbo Kamen suddenly appeared! Matsumoto called on him to help her. Kamen instead threw candy into the audience and walked off.
The 3rd minigame was “Gake No Fuchi Kiso Flag Race” where the first to attack Daisuke Kiso wins. Matsumoto stopped Brookes from entering the ring first but missed her attack on Kiso. Brookes booted Kiso in the face to win a point. Brookes then gave Matsumoto a Soccer Kick to the back but Kiso was too hurt to count the pin. That was when Sanshiro Takagi made his entrance and declared himself the special referee! He was too busy doing his “Fire!” entrance to count Brookes’ pin. When he did count it was slow enough for Matsumoto to kick out. Takagi kept slow counting Brookes. When Brookes complained about it, Takagi pushed him into a School Boy from Matsumoto for a fast count nearfall. Brookes gave Takagi a Stunner to make him go away.
Brookes put Matsumoto in another Romero Special, prompting another masked man to enter the room. Jushin Liger’s music played and out came Ohuchi Thunder Rider! However Shota attacked him, upset at the bait and switch. Ohuchi Rider left without doing anything.
The 4th minigame was “Gake no Fuchi Hagoita Showdown” based on a game that kind of looks like badminton. Matsumoto immediately missed her show so Brookes won the point. Brookes was then allowed write on Shota’s face as the other reward. “Gake no Fuchi Hagoita Showdown 2” then took place between Matsumoto and Parker. This time Parker missed his shot, giving Matsumoto her first point! Parker took his frustration out on Shota by doodling on his face. “Gake no Fuchi Hagoita Showdown 3” was then held but it was a repeat of the first game, giving Brookes another point. Shota’s face was covered in ink by this point.
Brookes began to light up Matsumoto’s chest with Chops, prompting her to cry for help. Kuishinbo Kamen came back and he got to fight Parker in the “Gake no Fuchi Boxing Match”. Kamen put on boxing gloves and was ready to fight until Parker started kicking him. Kamen sat down on a chair at ringside and refused to participate any further until there is proper boxing. He had to be lifted on the chair and carried out of the room. Brookes won the point by forfeit.
It was not time for the “Gake no Fuchi Drunkers Match”. A shot of sake must be drunk after every pin otherwise the wrestler is disqualified. Kamen returned and started wrestling with Brookes but he missed the announcement and did not understand the rules. Once he found out he asked Shota to take his place. After Shota drank a shot, Matsumoto took his place. She and Brookes had a bunch of nearfalls that resulted in both of them having to drink 5 shots. Matsumoto spat her second shot at Brookes and was disqualified.
Matsumoto found the boxing gloves and used them to punch Brookes a lot. They fought outside the ring where Brookes put her in an Octopus Stretch. The “Gake no Fuchi Sumo Match Final Day” came along this time with Matsumoto & Ohuchi Rider teaming up against Kamen. Matsumoto jumped on Rider and told him to charge. She fell off. Kamen was given a point.
The final minigame to take place was the “Gaki no Fuchi Darts Showdown”. Parker gave everyone some darts then took off his shirt to reveal a dartboard was drawn on his back! That’s right the wrestlers had to play darts with Parker’s back! Brookes was winning despite his friend being in a lot of pain. That was when Matsumoto pulled out a knife. This is the point of the match where things got out of control.
She said this is is a new year and everyone came to see pro wrestling, not this farce! She attempted to stab Brookes but he took the knife off her. When he approached Matsumoto with the knife, she told him they should wrestle instead. Without the knife. He agreed. Matsumoto then took out a “death bottle” and force fed it to Brookes on the ropes. Brookes pressed the knife up to her face to escape. Matsumoto then took out a stapler and stapled a NOAH flyer onto Brookes’ head. If that wasn’t enough, Matsumoto also bit his head and screamed “Blood!” when he finally got cut.
As the fighting went back and forth, Brookes was sent outside of the ring. Matsumoto dove onto him with an assistance from Metropoli-chan V. They then set up a ladder and moved the Spanish announce table up next to the ring. Brookes was placed on the table and Matsumoto put him through it with a dive from the ladder! Brookes was able to kick out and get back into the ring.
Brookes gathered together a bunch of plastic cases. He dived at Matsumoto but she dodged it and Brookes went through the cases. Brookes then took out a bag but Matsumoto kicked him and took it off him. She emptied the bag to reveal thumbtacks! However Brookes ended up Power Bombing her onto the tacks. He later did a Michinoku Driver II onto the tacks and Parker hit a Firebird Splash afterwards. Somehow Matsumoto kicked out of the pin!
Matsumoto was still fighting. She countered the Praying Mantis Bomb into a Cradle for a nearfall. She then kicked a chair into Brookes’ head with a Shining Gakezard. After that she did a Diving Foot Stomp from the top rope but Brookes kicked out.
Matsumoto then took out a bunch of bamboo skewers. She told Brookes “Thank you so much, goodbye!” before trying to push them into his scalp. Brookes blocked her and instead pushed the skewers into the top of Matsumoto’s head!
Finally the match ended when Brookes gave Matsumoto the Praying Mantis Bomb with the skewers still sticking out of her head. Brookes was rewarded with 3,000 points for getting the three count. The final score was Brookes: 3,007, Matsumoto: 1 and Kamen: 1.
Brookes had a lot to say about the match. He called it “fuckin’ stupid” but Matsumoto took it as a compliment. She told him this was going to be his best match for the year he stays in Japan. After today nothing in Japan will scare him. Brookes thanked Matsumoto but also said he won’t do this match again. When he left with Parker, Matsumoto said 2020 will definitely be a good year for her because she overcame such a fierce match today. She sang the Gake no Fuchi national anthem again and wished all the fans a happy new year.